I got single serving containers of unsweetened applesauce and pineapple chunks in juice for work but I am eating all the pineapple chunks first. I love pineapple.
My back still feels weird. Yesterday I was concerned that both of my kidneys were failing at the same time. Maybe I'm so not even pregnant, I just have an infection. Everytime I go to the bathroom, I'm on the lookout for my period. I can't believe I thought last week was horrible to wait through when this week obviously sucks the biggest ass ever. I took a pregnancy test last night and nothing yet. I'm so impatient, OHMYGOD, am I impatient about this. I just want to get started; I just want to pass the test.
I am trying not to talk about myself, think about myself and the state of my uterus but I'm consumed with myself. Which isn't really all that different than normal. I don't know if having a baby is the end of my selfishness or just another twist on it, a new variation if you will. Because it is still kind of about my wants isn't it, pregnancy I mean? I think this is why it is driving me crazy. I want to get over this 'focus on me' stage and get on with the making another person. I'm mostly excited about the other person part, the outta me, breathing oxygen on your own person. Those you can hug and squeeze (gently), watch smile, read books to, play with. Shannon has had no desire to ever grow a baby inside her. I have for a while now. But I'm thinking I'm going to be more freaked out by the parasite angle than I could have predicted.
